Friday, December 26, 2008


Merry Christmas to you and yours, readers. Hope your holidays were festive, and continue to be throughout the New Year.

I had the opportunity to work on my domestic diva skills. While many of you may think this involves the more difficult activities of domestic life, this actually only involves the very basics. Many people learn to simultaneously cook a full meal, do laundry, iron, and dust with the best of them. I, however, have an attention span problem. Yes, the ability to focus long enough to complete any of these tasks from start to finish completely escapes me.

Take this week, for instance. Our washing machine caught on fire the 23rd. The crack maintenance department at our apartment showed up, kicked the engine a few times, tightened some lug nuts, kicked the engine more, and suggested babysitting the machine for the next few loads of laundry. Anyone who knows me understands the difficulty of this task.

Of course, I stayed away from the machine long enough to ensure it would not explode the next time it was touched (and for Jeff to examine the damage thus far). The next day, however, as I stared down the pile of laundry that was mocking me, I took a deep breath and plunged in. As soon as the washing machine started, the problems began.

First, it started with a funny clicking noise that soon escalated into some gun-like bangs. As I approached it to shut off the machine, the ENTIRE FRONT of the washing machine shot across our laundry room. I thought the situation could not get worse... I quickly closed the laundry room doors and ran to the living room to call Jeff to get his advice. It's safe to say he was as flabergasted as I, as the scenario left him speechless.

I approached the laundry room sideways one slow step at a time, bracing myself with each step for the doors to be blown off and an explosion to follow. Almost there... So far, nothing. Then I smelled it... the flames were hidden somewhere inside the machine and smoke was beginning to curl up. In my wisdom I screamed like a banshee, unplugged the machine, and doused it with water in one deft move.

My domestic abilities are improving, believe it or not. This experience did not involve the fire department, and for that I am thankful.

This holiday season, let us pause to remember the experiences that make us who we are, the people that have shaped us, and everything we are thankful for. Happy Holidays.


Jessie Mae said...

Heather I love you to pieces! This about made me burst out loud laughing while I am sitting here at work...great story telling skills!

me said...

Carol says she enjoys these very much.....
I luv u bunches...

Jamie said...

How do these things always happen to you?? Sounds like you need to revisit your Fire Safety Plan. Don't forget to put a laminated copy of your exit route on the back of your front door.